Venmo Feminism

I like to hold onto the wet dreams of a reality where I am a magnet for capital

I tell people that I am a Venmo Feminist because Dasha Nekrasova told me to be and nothing tastes as good as money feels
“Because of the rampant sexual harassment in our society, it’s not really safe for women to have a job . . . so, in retribution, all gainfully employed men should just hop on Venmo and make things right, and just redistribute the wealth, if you will . . . and in return I won’t call anyone out, and I’ll stay relatively hot.”

I am submerged in a body of water, my lungs the vessels which keep me afloat
Each breath in drags me back up to the surface
I can hear my phone lying on the shore gathering heat from the sun
Inside its locked screen venmo singing a sweet song of repatriation reminding me of my body
The birds are quiet now
To distract me from the feeling I get when I surrender

Please don’t ask to take me out to dinner
I’m a Libra I will lie to you instead of saying no
My venmo cannot consume your $30 pasta
Being in your presence makes me feel so sick I don’t even need to drink wine to have my head spinning

The feeling of breathing outward is like falling into a void
A body that loses all meaning

Instead of saying no I say I don’t get off until 5am
So then you’ll think that I don’t want to come home with you because i’m tired
You can leave with your dignity intact, without being rejected by a girl that takes your $1 bills and turns them into thousands

The ocean becomes a vacuum to an airless body
My limbs spinning in the water waiting to be called back
The sound lives in the cords, a plug being pulled from an old bathtub
Their choking reaching out to me
So that when they are yanked from the wall
The gurgling of death can pull me back up

Venmo feminism only works when I do nothing
(I do the most)
But as I told a customer last night
“I am doing the most while you continually do the least”
(I always do the most)

Venmo feminism makes my body feel real
Venmo feminism gives you instant results
Venmo feminism takes from you while giving to me
Venmo feminism redistributes just the tiniest bit of wealth that should have already been mine
I want venmo feminism to leave you broke but I know that it just keeps me tied in waiting for more

What wet dream of patriarchy do you hold onto?

 

About the author
Mya Cole is an interdisciplinary artist and curator for Window Gallery. She is of Fijian heritage and she interrogates her relationship to her identity through her practice. Specifically she is interested in exploring the body and mind in their placement within the fluidity of online and offline connections.